Things to do instead of watching Delhi 6

1. Get a Root Canal and some kind of corrective surgery - without anaesthesia
2. Watch TV on loud volume and switch between India TV's latest idiotic/sick breaking news, a Saas Bahu serial & Baba Ramdev doing the Yoga with a little Travel and Living thrown in as the only light entertainment
3. Clean your bathroom, all the corners and EVERYTHING... Then clean someone else's bathroom, all the corners and EVERYTHING
4. Ask someone to bite your hand... HARD
5. Have a conversation with George W Bush about the recession and listen to him tell you why he's not responsible for any of it and how much he loves his daddy
6. Get stuck in a time warp where all you can hear are conversations between Ram Gopal Varma, Aamir Khan, Akshay Kumar, Shah Rukh Khan, Salman Khan, Subhash Ghai, Aditya Chopra and Kunal what's his name who made Fanaa defending themselves as they explain why they feel they have not lost the plot and Bollywood is actually far better than Hollywood because Bollywood can shake the booty far better than Hollywood... Basically defend all the crappy movies they've been making recently
7. Listen to Himesh Reshammiya's Tandoori Nights on the loudest possible volume while ducking as the people around you toss their shoes your way and narrowly escape your head
8. Eat something dreadfully stale with relish
9. Spend a day with a nagging someone who has the habit of saying 'I told you so' every 3 minutes
10. Wrestle with the person you think has the worst BO on the planet

In case I'm not saying it right, this movie sucks. There's too many thoughts and not enough sense. There's everything in the movie from a monkey controversy, to communalism, to Indian Idol-ism, to yawn yawn Ramayan-ism, to American Desi comes home-ism, to family feud-ism, to boy meets girl love story-ism to media hype-ism to Delhi tourism. But there's not a smidgen of soul.

And the part where the Big and Little B's meet is inspired... wait... no... STOLEN from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. It was obvious. And very very irritating.

In all of this, I just feel bad for Little B... Just can't catch a break, can he?

How is it possible that this came from the same person who gave us Rang De Basanti? I don't know... (ASS)K THE MONKEY.

And I want my money back.

Wow!

To combat the sense of loss I am feeling reading all the reviews of Delhi 6 (I'm just wondering why Abhishek can't seem to catch a break) I rented Tropic Thunder, to lift the spirits a bit. What I got was much more than I bargained for, 'cos this was something else!

Irreverant being the operative word, this movie is silly in parts, but the zany dialogue, a totally cuckoo Jack Black and an awesome awesome awesome Robery Downey Jr. make it a must watch! The dialogues are just ridiculously funny and I am actually reading them off IMBD right now. Don't expect depth from this film, but for what it is, it's far better than what one expects.

Downey Jr.... Oh my God! I was ecstatic as I saw just how fabulous he was. How lucky we are to have him back from what I can just refer to as the 'dark place'. This guy is TALENT! He's uproariously funny playing the actor who stays in character right up until the DVD commentary's out. He's crazy, crazy, CRAZY!!! I think he should win the Oscar. I know he won't but hell, I'm definately putting him on my list.

Did I mentioned Tom Cruise??? Oh my god, he is what delivers this film to the next level! I didn't know he had it in him, I gotta say... I guess half the impact of having him around would have been lost if it wasn't for the 'F' word, but still, he is IN FORM!

I can't wait to watch this movie again... You have to got to have this as part of your collection! Ben Stiller, you are the man!

Oscar Season

I love the movies. I love going to the movies. I love renting movies. I love talking to people about movies. I love talking at people about movies. Basically, give me an existence with just a bunch of DVD's and I am sorted! How sad is that?

Anyways... Come award season when it's all about the big race between the underdog movie, the ashes to glory movie, the dark horse movie, the special effects reinvented movie, the heart of gold movie, etc, etc, I have my own thoughts and analysis which come into play and two lists - my list of 'the adored who should win' and another list of winners based on trends and forecasts. Sometimes, they actually match. It's official business, this!

I've said my piece about 'Slumdog Millionaire' and 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button', undoubtedly the hot favorites this season. I loved them both and for different reasons. I am torn between the two but they remain my two top movies this season, after having watched 'Milk', 'Doubt', 'Revolutionary Road', 'The Changeling', 'Frost/Nixon' and the thoroughly entertaining 'Vicky Christina Barcelona'.

While 'Milk' was extremely well made and the performances by Sean Penn, Josh Brolin and James Franco were truly very superior, it was Emile Hirsche who stole my heart. I wonder if this role came to him after Penn directed him in 'Into The Wild' which was a very interesting and a very moving film. Sean Penn is, of course, the master of his art. His role as Harvey Milk just made me want to give him a peck on the cheek. Many well deserved nominations for this movie, but I felt like it would be way more appreciated by the people whom it was focusing on and extend to perhaps San Francisco lovers, or to the liberal United States public. But it left me watching a movie as opposed to having an experience. I think that is probably because the subject isn't close to my heart. Sometimes, you see pain and suffering and resolve, but it's never as good as when you experience it first hand. Kudos to the torch bearers though!

Now 'Doubt' on the other hand was totally my cup of tea. It seemed to me like an excellent movie adaptation of a play, and then as it turned out, it was! A Pulitzer winner too! Excellent performances and fantastic dialogues made this a thought provoking film that really made me 'feel' the subject. My brain whirred on and on as I watched this somber yet compelling film that engulfed me in a state of tenseness thanks to it's riveting storyline and backdrop to match. The colours and locations all seem to convey a certain sense of gloom and the atmosphere is detatched and cold. Everything comes together to convey Meryl Streep's closed mind and obstinate refusal to acknowledge uncertainty until she is forced to in the end. The actual thing that is doubted is not the point, it is the doubt itself that holds the entire film together. A treat for an agnostic like me and for anyone who enjoys good dialogue!

Watch Revolutionary Road only if you can handle a little depression. The film explores the lives of a couple in American suburbia trying to come to terms with just how similar and just how different they are from the others. You really feel for Kate Winslet initially as she portrays a willful and spirited April, but towards the end you can't help but sympathise with the practical yet confused Frank, played by Leonardo Di Caprio, who starts off wanting to be anything but this father, only to realize that he's not as different as he thought he was. The stillness of the backdrop with its perfect home, well pruned backyard, white picket fence and clean everything juxtaposes brilliantly against the turmoil the couple is going through. One of the final scenes in which a bleeding April stains the carpet seems to represent a kind of shift... The outside has been 'spoilt' but the inside is freed or relieved in some way of the weight it carries. If you are undaunted by gloom, watch the movie for its art direction and intense scenes.

More thoughts as and when they surface...

A hero lost...

There are 2 India's. One likes Himesh Reshamiyya and his cap. The other detests him and simply does not get why his cap is such a phenomenon, or gets it but feels like they live in a world gone terribly wrong. I have a point...

Aamir Khan used to make movies for India no. 2 earlier. With Ghajini, he seems to have switched. I cannot call it a bad movie. It is what a masala movie is I guess. In fact, it delivers South Indian filmmaking a tribute of sorts with it's filthy looking villian and his filthier looking henchmen, saccharine sweet heroine who is annoying and over the top and killing you with kindness all at once and hero that breaks necks and kicks the shit out of baddies at the slightest provocation. Everybody happy and Himesh has another remake option!

But what happened to Aamir Khan? I love the fact that he wanted to make a commercial action flick. That he worked so hard to make his body like it's never been before. That he created a whole new look with his bald head and ripped physique. But as I have come to realize, that's about all you get even after watching this movie. The rest of the film is a combination of violence and stupidity. The violence is OK to a certain extent (one can argue that it was 'required'). But the stupidity? Luckily, Aamir Khan saves the day. He's an actor par excellence and basically carries the movie. The only reason why you don't stop watching it is because he's in it.

So what's stupid? Well, let's start with the heroine. She has neither style nor class and all she does is tries to act cute. She comes off as unnatural and completely over the top with her 'save the people and then torture them with giggles' attitude. She's ok when sober but that's a rare occurence. Now comes the other heroine. She's basically a poodle in woman's clothing. Either that or just someone in need of a haircut. Desperately in need. The storyline is action-oriented as opposed to dialogue slash action-oriented even though the subject is interesting and could have been handled intelligently. Memento is far superior even though the protagonist in it goes by the name of 'Guy' in real life!

I got a little tired of hearing about this movie because it was too much in the news. I kept thinking 'it's going to be great, but all of Aamir's other films have been so why is this being hyped to death???'. I think Aamir Khan realized that the movie needed to make up in marketing what it lacked in content. He's way too smart and has gone all out becoming the new friendly poster boy version of himself, but doesn't that make him just like his counterparts? It is sort of sad... He truly get his art and has been a part of exceptional films, be it Lagaan or Dil Chahta Hai or Rang De Basanti or Taare Zameen Par. So what the hell is this? There was only one honest review I read about this movie and that was by Mayank Shekhar in the Mumbai Mirror. I thought he was being a jerk, having great faith in Aamir Khan and all... But he was right! The movie stinks and even Aamir Khan's stellar performance does not salvage it from the B grade fare that it is.

I think India no. 1 accepted this movie the way they accept Indian television sitcoms and India no. 2 used to have a silent poster boy but he seems to have gotten too confident having jumped over the fence into India no. 1's territory. The difference between them is grand, and yet all that seems to stand between them is a cap. Aamir Khan was exactly the sort to condemn the cap. Now he's wearing it too.

Swept Away

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button is the Forrest Gump of 2008. It has everything an Oscar front runner would require and is armed to the hilt for battle with its concept (given more respect being inspired by a short story by Fitzgerald), backdrop, historical significance, cinematography, tragic love story, and above all else, the underdog protagonist.

Yet, you forget about these things when you get immersed in this saga of love, loss, redemption, loneliness and the struggle to find peace within. While the premise is simply of a man who ages backwards, this movie is more about the relationships that the man develops and of the simple notion that never leaves him - that he is getting younger as others get older, and that he will see them age before him and eventually lose them. It is about a man who loves completely and is forever fascinated by the opposite sex, almost in awe and so very respectful. Be it the woman who adopted him or the one who he slept beside, he seems to treat them with a quiet dignity.

This movie is like an object that demands your full attention, and I could not help but give it just that. It is long and one must be patient, but this is the sort of cinema that sweeps you away. The journey has a sense of melancholy, but nonetheless also possesses the romance that often accompanies tragedy. I'd watch it again just to get inspired. To see how a child proclaimed a devil at birth touches the lives of so many people and how he learns from them and how much he gives them in return.

We live in tumultuous times. Everything is fleeting. I don't quite know if the world will end in my time, or a more wrecked version of it will be there for my children to see. Or if I will be proved a pessimist and things will actually get better. It is heartening to place yourself at the disposal of cinema that transports you out of your current frame of mind and takes you someplace else. You drown yourself and you emerge a little better than before, having been touched by the beauty of people you may never meet and lives than will never cross your path. Ironic? Well, such is life...