Love Aaj Nahin

Or better yet, Lacklustre Aaj Kal.

I like the second title better because it's a blanket statement... Not just in reference to one film. It says 'I don't know what is going on with 2009, probably with the lowest count of good Hindi movies, ever since the 80's'.

It means that I have not seen a single 'fantastic' or 'great' or even 'good' movie since 'Dev D'. And nothing 6 months before or after worth talking about. 'Dostana' was OK I guess, but it wasn't anything to take home with you. And that too, only once you made your peace with the fact that it was supposed to be stupid.

It means that all these movies that come out prostitute the media so beautifully that they actually get away with multiple stars or just a couple, when all they deserve is a shrug as you walk past disappointed... Again. What is it with the Hindi film industry? These so called 'directors' give one 'superhit' and then get so caught up in trying to promote themselves and their next movie, they forget to make the movie. I guess I should have seen it coming once Aamir Khan sold out and made Ghajini, probably one of the worst hits of all time in the history of world cinema. It's no surprise then that we kept trying to claim 'Slumdog Millionaire' for ourselves!

I went for Love Aaj Kal last night and I have to say, the media is just full of ridiculous liars! I read somewhere that the dialogues are good. THEY SUCK! This film hinges on the phrase 'Mango People'. It's the lifeblood of the film, desperately trying to keep it together. And yet, the joke is delivered without any build up and not funny. That's not all! The last song with the end credits has this huge lit up sign reading 'Mango People' right next to 'Pratigya'. What the hell?

I also read that Saif was really good in the movie. I think they substituted the word 'old' for the word 'good' everywhere. Least they could have done is caught onto a younger chap to deliver the silly dialogues.

And what is with the repetition? Are we stupid? Can we not retain information obtained from a dim-witted 3 hour movie? The scenes and dialogues are constantly repeated practically word for word. If I hear the word 'logical' again, I might shoot myself.

And what happened to the Imtiaz Ali that we love? Is there some kind of quicksand that sucks these guys in and replaces them with idiots? How could he do this after 'Socha Na Tha' and 'Jab We Met'? I'm just going to assume someone put a gun to his head.

FINALLY, did Neetu Kapoor really have to show up in the end? I mean, really? Only Karan Johar should be allowed to get away with crap like that!

Please spare us the bullshit! We tend to expect less in any case, knowing it's a Hindi movie we are paying for, but did you have to make me pay Rs.500 bucks for 2 tickets to a Mangofest? At least, give me a couple of Alphonsos to take back!